Things have changed considerably, both in my own life and in the world of adoption, since my parents first took me home in the Spring of 1982. At the time I was the subject of some concern as I wasn’t “thriving” and was expected to have learning difficulties. My parents were told very little about my background, but what they were told tended to err on the negative side, meaning they kept an open mind, with no expectations of what I might achieve in the future.

Now, at 39, I hold a senior position in a university and am about to start a PhD, and I perform stand-up comedy on the side. My life has been one full of opportunity thanks to the love, support and enthusiasm of my adoptive parents who always encouraged me to try anything and everything, no matter whether I would be good at it or not! They gave me the confidence to push my boundaries, and the courage to fail and then try again.

My adoption has dominated my adult life more than I expected: my brother traced me back in 2013, and as a result I am now in touch with a number of people from my birth family. I am especially close to my mother, who, after all these years, is now in touch with my parents too. This contact has allowed her to see what became of me, and to realise that I and my parents love and respect her, and, far from blaming her or thinking less of her for being unable to care for me at the time, see her as an important part of our lives - I would not be who I am today without her and my wonderful parents. While there are always things that can be improved or changed in the adoption system, I am fortunate that my family’s story is a very successful and happy one.

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