Tracing birth family within the UK: pre-1975 adoptions Before you get started Many adoptees describe the process of searching for information and tracing and making contact with birth relatives as ‘an emotional rollercoaster’. It may take you on an unpredictable and uncertain journey with emotional highs and lows, periods of activity and times when little or no progress is being made. The search can bring about a multitude of mixed feelings including frustration, excitement, anticipation and disappointment. Although your experience is unique to you, it can be helpful to reach out to other adoptees who have undertaken the search as certain feelings and experiences are relatively common. It is worth thinking about setting realistic expectations and goals from the start. What are you setting out to do? Are you looking for information, or would you like to take this further and identify and make contact with birth relatives? What are your chances of finding information, identifying your birth parents and making contact with them? You may need to take breaks from the search, stepping back when you need to. It may be necessary to take time to process the information you receive or help with managing times when you are waiting for responses. You may also need to adjust your goals and your hopes as you go along. Again, it can take time to come to terms with these adjustments. Understanding the challenges, and evolving perspectives around tracing birth relatives In recent years, there has rightly been a growing emphasis on the importance of providing adopted children and young people with information about their birth family and facilitating direct or indirect contact between them, where this is safe and in the interests of the child. Historically, providing adopted people with information about birth family was not generally considered important. Less was known about child development, identity and the importance of knowing about family origins. While forced adoption of the children of unmarried, single mothers was being practised, there was often considerable shame which added to the secrecy surrounding adoption. In this powerful two-part conversation, host Nerys, an adult adoptee, speaks with Dr. Michael Lambert of Lancaster University about the hidden history and lasting impact of forced adoption practices in the UK. Getting support and taking care of yourself Many adoptees say that it is important to identify someone who is able to support you through the process of tracing. You may need someone who can listen and offer encouragement and support, especially if the process becomes frustrating and lengthy and if you are given information which is difficult to take in. You may need to carefully consider who you ask to support you. For instance, you may prefer supporters who are ‘neutral’ and who have no emotional involvement in the search. You may want to explicitly set out what you would like support with. For instance, you could ask for your supporter to accompany you to appointments, to help you search for and keep track of information, or to be someone you can talk to. Tracing your records can answer many important questions you have about your adoption, but it may be at times stressful and frustrating. Go at a pace that suits you and take breaks, especially when you need to process information. It can be helpful to connect with other adoptees who have accessed their records. If you would like to speak to someone who can provide information and signposting and who can offer a listening ear, contact our information and support line. It is free and you can call from anywhere in the UK. You could also consider joining AUK's Adopted Person Membership and coming along to a community group to connect with other adult adoptees and share your experiences. Gathering information Gather together all the information you have about your birth and your birth family members. This can include information held on records you already have including birth names, birth date and location and names of birth family members. Your adoptive family and where relevant your previous foster carers may have information they can share with you including photographs. You may need to speak to family members to gather information that has been passed on verbally, bearing in mind that this might not always be accurate. We recommend that you keep a written record of the information you gather and scan the documents you have. Locating records You have the right to access your birth and adoption records including the below. Birth and adoption certificates To get a copy of your original birth certificate and/or your adoption certificate, contact the General Register Office/National Records in the nation you live in. England and Wales: Adoption records Scotland: Adoption records Northern Ireland: Tracing and contacting birth relatives and adopted adults Adoption file The records of your birth, birth parents, adoption and, if relevant, your care experience should be held in your adoption file, which you have a right to see. There are several routes to locate your file: The organisation that arranged your adoption, such as a charity or local authority. Some organisations are no longer in existence, and some may have changed their name. You may need to carry out some internet detective work to trace them. Agency Finder has information about Voluntary Adoption Agencies across the UK. Fostering and adoption agency datasets has information about adoption and fostering agencies in England. Your local authority’s adoption team, or your local Health and Social Care Trust health board. Adoption Search Reunion contains a database of adoption records and some further information about tracing. It primarily relates to adoptions in England and Wales but also contains some information about records held in Scotland, Northern Ireland and the Republic of Ireland. Information for locating records in Scotland is summarised here. Birthlink is a Scottish charity that offers advice and support. Information for locating records in Wales is summarised here. If you live in Northern Ireland, contact your local Health and Social Care Trust. Intermediary services You may prefer to use an intermediary service to assist with tracing records and making contact with birth relatives. This is someone who will undertake tracing on your behalf. Depending on where you live and when your adoption took place, you may be offered an intermediary service. You can also search for services here . There are private services who will undertake tracing for a fee. Intermediaries can help with making initial contact with birth family members, especially if they may not be aware of you and your connection with them. They are experienced at sharing difficult information and will help you to think through the ‘what ifs’ and prepare you for the information you might find. Missing records and delays At Adoption UK, we often hear from people adopted before 1975 who are told their records have been lost or destroyed due to incidents such as fires or floods. These records are sometimes eventually located. If you are told your records are missing, it may be worth challenging this information and continuing your search. If you'd like a listening ear or advice on how to approach this, you could get in touch with our information and support line. You may experience delays in responses from agencies. If this is the case, send reminders to prompt them to reply to you. If you experience poor service, it can be worth escalating a request, for example to the head of the service in the agency you have approached. AUK are calling for reliable support for adult adoptees to access personal adoption records and connect with birth families and this is one of the key recommendations outlined in the Adoption Barometer. Reading your records Reading your records can answer many long-standing questions you have had. It can also raise more questions and uncertainties. You may find information that is distressing, or language used about you or your birth family that is, by modern standards, judgemental or harsh. For this reason, it is worth considering bringing someone with you who can offer support. In some circumstances, you may be offered support from a professional in an adoption agency as you access your records. You can also get in touch with our information and support line. The Adoption Contact Register There are Adoption Contact Registers in England and Wales, Scotland, and Northern Ireland. These are registers of adoptees and of birth relatives that wish to be put in contact with each other. This can only happen if both parties agree. The registers are run by the Registrars General in England and Wales, and Northern Ireland, and by Birthlink in Scotland: In England, Wales and Northern Ireland you must be over 18 to add your name. In Scotland you must be over 16 to add your name. There is a fee for adding your name to the register. If both parties have registered a wish for contact, an automatic link is made – the Registrar General sends the birth relative’s name and address, with details of the relationship to you. The birth relative is told that this has been done. This does not mean that you have to make contact with your birth relative – it’s up to you to decide whether you want to make contact. If you change your mind about being contactable, you need to notify the Registrar General. A fee will be charged to amend the registration. Social Media Many systems and processes around adoption were developed before it became possible to find and contact individuals over social media. You might choose to use social media to find information to help you in your search and in deciding your next steps. It is worth being cautious in making contact and asking for information through social media. Here are some considerations: How would you feel if you didn’t receive a reply, or the reply was negative? Are you happy for your name and whereabouts to be known by your birth family? Have you correctly identified a birth family member? What might the repercussions be if you have misidentified someone? If communications begin, do you have boundaries in place such as the individuals you are happy to communicate with and the quantity and timing of messages? Do you have any safety concerns? There is more information here: Making contact through social media DNA Testing You may decide to pursue genetic testing as the only remaining option open to you, as a way of gathering additional information and to help you identify biological relatives. DNA testing will give you information about your ethnicity and, should you choose for your information to be included on a DNA register, potential DNA matches. This is general advice about some of the considerations that you may wish to make before you embark on DNA testing: it is worth spending some time considering what the potential outcomes could be and how these would make you feel. For example, you may find information that is unexpected, or you may find very little new information, DNA testing packs are not always delivered in discrete packaging, DNA testing will give you information about your ethnicity. What you discover through DNA testing may differ from the ethnicity you’ve grown up identifying with, DNA testing may tell you the ethnicity of your biological parents, it may not be clear as to which parent is which, this is due to them being identified as parent 1 and parent 2. You might be able to find this out from other information and records you have, check out the privacy policies of the companies that offer DNA testing. Some give more options about how your data would be used and shared than others, check out which DNA register/s the companies would include your data in. Some registers have more information from more individuals than others. Bear in mind that there are many parts of the world where individuals are unlikely to have carried out DNA testing, Once you get DNA results, contacting genetic matches can be delicate, especially if your biological family is unaware of your existence. It’s important to approach the situation respectfully and with care. You can opt out of the “contact a match” service. Managing the responses of others One of the complexities of tracing birth family can be the responses of those around you. You may have adoptive parents and other family members and friends who are supportive and encouraging. You may have family members and others in your life who feel hurt and rejection or find it difficult to understand your reasons for wanting to search. It is common to feel as though you must manage the responses of others. It is important to remember that everyone has a right to know about their origins, early lives and identities. There may be people in your life who need help to understand that your search is not a rejection of them, you could direct them to our Information and Support Line. Making contact through social media Tracing birth family within the UK - post-1975 adoptions Manage Cookie Preferences