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Overseas adoption

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We are considering adopting from overseas and was just wondering if people could give us their pros and cons with regards to adopting from abroad. Thanks


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Cons:

- expensive

- institutionalised children

- often very damaged children, often abandonment

- fas, mental health, learning disabilities, addictions in birth parents as in the uk

- often yearly updates than nothing, depending on country, maybe that's a pro

- have to pick up the child from far, adoption in itself very traumatising, going with strangers who do not speak your language etc.

- very little information about the children, I got one A4.

- children are often 'trained' to do well in test, know shapes, colours, songs etc, so unreliable test results.

- often attachment problems because of many carers

- in baby adoption, corruption, illegal adoptions, etc


Pros:

- to be honest I'm not sure, I adopted from EE because it was the closest I was allowed to adopt from. If I could have adopted from the country I lived in than I would have done that. I pressume you live in the uk, than in my opinion take an uk child. You are not going to get 'a better child' because you travel 8000 miles.


Anyway just my opinion, why travel half the world if children in the uk are waiting for a loving family? If foreign adoption is your only option than give a home to a child what otherwhise would have none.


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Cons:

Many countries now closed for adoption.


May take a long time to go through process as you have to complete the process both here and in other country and often paperwork goes missing etc.


When I looked into this 4 years ago there were no adoption agencies that did intercountry adoption and we would have to work with an American agency. May have changed since then though.


Breakdowns in communication between other country and here


Corrupt practices e g officials asking for designer handbags and whisky!! Babies sold on black market etc.


You have to go over twice to the country usually and one of the times it's for about a month so you would need to be able to take this time off work.


I calculated it would cost between £13,000 and £20,000.


Be prepared to be met with lots of questions by your social worker over here as social services are quite against intercountry adoption and will try to persuade you to adopt from here.


Not much information about the child's background, health etc.


This might seem like a pro but actually it's a con: No contact with birth family and little information. It's so important to have as much information as possible and very hard for someone growing up unsure of their background and identity.


Cultural issues e.g. different food, language. If you adopt a child who is a different race to you, everyone will know they've been adopted. Sometimes it's nice to just go out and be seen as any other family without anyone knowing about their adoption or asking awkward questions in front of your child.


Pros:

You would be helping some of the neediest children of all, taking them out of an institution and giving them a family. In Russia, the children are sent out of orphanages etc when they reach 18 with no support. Only 1 in 10 will go on to have a normal life, while the others either resort to alcoholism, prostitution or suicide. So you really would be pulling a child out of the very worst situation, giving them the hope and future they would never otherwise have.


I have two cousins adopted from abroad who are so loved by us all. They were adopted about ten years ago and the country they are from is now closed for adoption.


We seriously looked into intercountry adoption but couldn't find an agency to work with in UK and met too many obstacles. In the end we did concurrent planning (which has its own hurdles and uncertainties) and were matched with a four month old baby who we finally adopted at 2 years old


Wishing you all the best in your research and decisions.


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