Lots of health problems between us?

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Hi everyone!

My husband has Becker Muscular Dystrophy (muscle wasting condition) he uses two sticks and a wheelchair more and more. I have Bipolar Disorder and OCD.

We have carers who come in to help and we're each other's Primary carers. We work hard to adapt and enjoy life together. I still get ill with episodes but I also work extremely hard to stay well and in recovery (I even teach Recovery sessions!)

I was wondering if there was any chance we'd be accepted for adoption? It's something I'd like to look into later down the line but thought I'd ask here?

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well you won't know until you apply but to be absolutely honest I think you will struggle with two of you being having health and disability conditions.

An SW will be thinking, if you have carers that come in and are carers for each other, where does a child actually fit in ? They would be concerned about a child becoming a carer. What would happen if you were ill, what about finances?

Try and think about everyday scenarios, the school run, parents evenings, getting them to activities, looking after them if they are poorly, how would you manage them? Add on top of that 'extras' adoptive children have such as therapy, medical appointments.

Only you know how much your conditions impact on your daily life, but I think you have a lot to consider.

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Hi Serrakunda thank you for your reply, that's unfortunately what we've been concerned about (and also why we were planning to look into it further down the line) We're preparing ourselves for a life without children and it's really hard. It's a real shame as kids love us. We're creative, caring and reliable; it's just our health letting us down.


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((Hugs)) Tisa

I have to agree with Serrakunda that although you sound like lovely people who are great with kids, I also think you would find it hard to get approved as adopters with your health issues.

I hope you can find peace as you look to the future...


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Thank you Bop for your kind reply

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It's a harsh world sometimes Tisa everyone here has had their dreams of parenthood so we do understand. But you do have to think about your capacity to parent and only you know what that is. So ask yourself those questions

The other thing to consider is the impact of adoptive children on your own physical, emotional and mental health. Adoption takes its toll on the fittest and healthiest of us.

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We definitely know that it's a harsh world sometimes...

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Hi Tisa, I've been racking my brains to try and think of some way forward for you. What I have wondered about is child befriending schemes as something positive to do in the short term? It takes away the need to add extra 'care' into your lives, which do seem full, but makes the most of your obvious capacity to have courage in the face of adversity - so that you become a mentor - something you seem to be doing already!

Best of luck. hx

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Thank you Haven for your encouraging message, I've been thinking about doing that and will look into local charities Smile

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If things become more positive in the future, having something like that under your belt would be really good. You could sell yourself to the organisations on your own resilience. x

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