Help! Hair problem!

Report content

Hello! All looks very different, I haven't visited for a while! Wondering if someone could help with some advice for my daughters hair. She 's mixed race but has quite a tight curl which would turn to dreadlocks within a week if left to it's own devices. I've always been quite proud of the condition of her hair. We oil it and plait it in 4 plaits and that usually keeps for 3-4 days and then it needs doing again. She washes and conditions it once a fortnight usually. This has worked just fine for the last 10 years but all of a sudden we seem to have got this terrible build up of oil that I can't get rid of. Before when we undid her plaits her her would be silky and soft, nourished by the oil. But now when I undo the plaits it's hard and sticky - it's really horrible. I wonder if it's because for the last six months or so she's been washing her own hair in the shower and maybe she's not rinsing properly. But anyway i've tried soaking it in bicarb and apple cider vinegar which was a remedy I found on the internet but that's not worked. Also when I 've done that it really feels as though it needs more oil, even though it's still sticky, but then I'm loath to put more on for fear of adding to the build up I still haven't got rid of. I feel like the only option would be to cut it all off and start again! We've used various oils over the years but for the last three years have been using 'Kids Organics' Hair and Scalp Treatment. Hoping one of you might be able to help. Unfortunately my husband and his family fell out when his mum died so we don't have that resource any more. Thanks

147 users have supported this.

If you nip over to the old site you might find something on there if you do a search . Maybe time to find a proper hairdresser though, if she's been with you 10 years the teenage years must be approaching so she might want to think about different styles anyway. Thankfully Simba is boy and I deal with this with a no 2 at the barbers !

111 users have supported this.

Not sure how old your dd is but as tey get older the hair changes just like every other living part of the body.

1.is she washing her hair or getting it wet every time she gets in the shower .

Is there any black mums in your dd school that you can reach out to its so difficult to comment with out seeing ther hair black hair is so diverse its very hard to comment with out seeing it.

109 users have supported this.

Hi, thanks for your replies. She does often get her hair wet in the shower, do you think that could be the problem? She's actually 10, I got that bit wrong, she's been with us for 9 years. Difficult at school as she's at middle school now so we don't get to meet any of the parents. There was a mum from primary that I was friendly with, but we haven't kept in touch, maybe I'll ask her advice. Thanks again,

Leek and potato

115 users have supported this.


On the old Adoption UK site a lot of people recommended www.britishcurlies.co.uk as a good sorce of information especially about using conditioner only to 'wash' dual heritage hair.

Good luck

107 users have supported this.

Yes black hair should not get wet if possible

She should onl y be washing her hair every 1-2 weeks.

As it drys the hair out and strips it of it oils

102 users have supported this.


You can find a screengrab of a helpful thread from the old boards here - http://www.adoptionuk.org/afro-hair-care

All the best,


Online Team

131 users have supported this.

Thanks for the link, I had no idea how to get back to the old site, so that's really helpful. Love all the natural hair recipes on the thread, will try some of those.

Have had some success now with an extra soaking in water, bicarb and cider vinegar to get rid of the oil build up. Followed by a green tea rinse and a final rinse of diluted cider vinegar. The stickiness has gone and I've just lightly oiled it this time. Thank goodness it was half term, we've spent a lot of time sorting it out! But I do need to change the oil going forward so will look at less processed options I think. I've also given Swede a shower cap- which she thinks is hilarious! - to keep her hair dry between wash day which is usually one a fortnight. I think Fishwife, that could well be the cause. I think getting it wet and it drying out everyday has sort of set the oil in her hair in some way, so I really think this might help. And we've agreed that I'll wash her hair for her to make sure we rinse out all the conditioner.

Thanks so much for all your help,

Leekandpotato x

115 users have supported this.

So glad your getting to grips

112 users have supported this.


As a dual-heritage lady Iv'e found best way to manage my Afro hair is to always use really rich creamy conditioner and to leave a slight residue in after rinsing-sometimes also use leave in conditioner. It then becomes a lot softer and easier to comb through and style.

11Be the first user to support this