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We were turned down by LA as we are Jewish and vegetarian. We are still fighting a discrimination case, we approached the ombudsman out of the allowed timeline and they will not investigate further and we need to give them some extenuating circumstances as to why we could not contact them sooner.

We told them we were going through other agencies and struggling to continue our adoption journey, this is not enough.

it has to be something extreme to make them take on our case.

Any ideas from anyone would be very much appreciated.

We are really gutted that we cannot take this further.

thank you v much


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22 users have supported this.

At what point were you turned down and did they actually cite those as grounds? Lots of people are turned down by various agencies for a multitude of reasons. We were turned down by two. Are you actually accusing them of racial discrimination?


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21 users have supported this.

Yes this is the exact reason they didn't take us on.


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11 users have supported this.

Yes this is the exact reason they didn't take us on.


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24 users have supported this.

Because they didn't have any children who fit your criteria? Sorry, just trying to understand the reasoning. My worry would be that if you do continue down this road instead of acceptance and moving on, then you're never going to be approved or matched. This must be taking up so much time and energy. ...what are you hoping to achieve?


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23 users have supported this.

It's worrying that they have been so blunt in telling you that you are unsuitable due to your vegetarian and Jewish status. I find it very odd that any Social Services dept would actually put that in writing or even say it.

What I can understand is that they may say that they will find it very hard to find a child to match with you who shares your race/religion. I can also understand that they may ask you how open you are to bringing up a child as a non-vegetarian if that was what the child was used to, and being concerned if you didn't express and open and willing approach to this.

Are you clear that the reasons you state are a rejection in terms of YOUR suitability? Or could it be that the agency is saying 'actually you're not what we're looking for at the moment, the reason being that we rarely have Jewish children needing placement. In addition we're concerned that you may find it difficult if you are not completely open to flexibility when raising a child and recognising that parental expectations of children cannot always be realised'

That's not quite the same.

I'd try elsewhere without complaining unless you really want a battle which may get you nowhere. Look at VAs and look at agencies in cities with good sized Jewish communities if they are within reach.


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25 users have supported this.

They used the exact words that after a telephone conversation only, they would close our file and could not accept us due to being J and V.

This is racial discrimination and we do not want this happening to other couples.

Please see that if this had been a Muslim or Black couple there would have been outrage, so why is this any less important.

We were very offended and insulted.

Of course we are open and did say this to them, we never expected a Jewish child. There are no Jewish children to adopt.

We also never asked for the Ac to be a veggie.


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3Be the first user to support this

however we should never have been treated like this at all.


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16 users have supported this.

But the reality is that people are turned down or discriminated against for all sorts of reasons. We were turned down by two agencies because we didn't want to adopt a sibling group. Twice. We went elsewhere. People have been turned down for being dog owners. It happens. I guess you have a choice on how you spend your time and energy although tbh I really can't see what you will achieve. Even if you 'win ' in many respects you lose.


While you're fighting, time is passing. Time better used on looking elsewhere. Just my opinion.


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18 users have supported this.

We were turned down by our LA, because we are white - also after one phone call. We weren't what they were looking for, based on the children they were trying to place. We went with a VA instead. After approval we were told by several sw that we weren't the right ethnicity for their white British children (we are white European). Ironically we adopted transracially in the end. If I were you, I would try another agency.


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16 users have supported this.

Chestnut tree is simple to change to another agency?


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34 users have supported this.

Hi Rev

Yes easy to change in theory you just walk. You'll need to offer some explanation to the new agency of course so they know you aren't moving agency for criminal reasons for example. But in theory at least you can go for adoption approval processing anywhere. VA or LA .


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9 users have supported this.

I know you've said in previous posts that you've been to 3 agencies. Have they all said the same thing? or are they using it as one of several reasons why they're turning you down? VA's tend to be better at accepting people who have additional things to consider so maybe it's worth heading down that route like others have said.


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31 users have supported this.

We took a very serious complaint via ombudsman before and it took ages and in the end they offered a rehashed version of what that la said. Which was a pack of lies. The options are complaints via council ofsted & care commission. Martin Narey may be interested in your case if you email him.

if you still want to continue into the world of adoption then this is not a good route as councils have long memories. They're not positive about complaints

Vegetarian and Jewish is a big point to prove for an assessing sw. I know sw here have a really tough job getting christians through but Sikh Muslim Hindu seem to have a much easier ride. The SWs tell me they have to be extra thorough and be prepared for long questions and decision maker delays. It sounds like you're facing similar within your lot re Judaic practice

So there's prejudging going on on religious/ cultural grounds and I think it's possibly deeper than the stuff you get on weight or having a dog it's because faith and culture underpin so much of who we are as people.


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9 users have supported this.

Thanks Peartree.


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18 users have supported this.

I adopted 10 years ago, I had to write out what being Jewish means to me! My dh wrote what being Scottish ment to him as a counter balance! I live in a an area I wouldn't have been surprised if I was the first Jewish adopter she had meet. Go to another agency. I had to promise not to bring them up as Jewish.

This may be the first of many battles. Good luck.


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7 users have supported this.

I adopted 10 years ago, I had to write out what being Jewish means to me! My dh wrote what being Scottish ment to him as a counter balance! I live in a an area I wouldn't have been surprised if I was the first Jewish adopter she had meet. Go to another agency. I had to promise not to bring them up as Jewish.

This may be the first of many battles. Good luck.


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18 users have supported this.

As sheila 2 has said, maybe they think your going to bring them up as jewish. Not actually in a way of discrimination, although it must had seemed that way. Silly really, considering everyone has different faiths, cultures etc...


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12 users have supported this.

Our LA couldn't get their heads around me being Jewish and my husband Catholic. This was 13 years ago. They didn't think they would be able to match us but then they were a pretty useless LA, still are and we abandoned them! Go to Norwood if you live anywhere near or around London - they are a VA and were brilliant and very helpful! I wish I had complained about my LA but I didn't have any energy left in me after the whole process of adoption!


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21 users have supported this.

This thread is a year old so things possibly moved on now?


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16 users have supported this.

Contact Coram North London team Gillian Kirsch is the manager. They are the team which transferred from Norwood Jewish Adoption Agency


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1Be the first user to support this

Hi,


I know this is an old post but wanted to comment, I'I Jewish, single and planning to adopt, my initial contact was with coram, not a great start I have to say, I was told outright, there are NO Jewish children put up for adoption.

I'm liberal Jewish so not orthodox, my practice of Judaism is traditional rather than religious, I do attend a synagogue but as my father is Christian I also celebrate Xmas.

When I approached my LA they spent ages on the phone to explore my interpretation of Judaism and asked if I would raise a child to celebrate Christian and Jewish festivals, I said yes,because that's how I was raised, I live in an area with no Jewish schools so would not go that route with education, however I made it clear that in my mind I would raise a child with a Jewish identity because as a liberal Jewish woman my children will be liberal Jewish. My LA were very happy with this explanation and happy to work with me. This year on Xmas eve which was also first night of Chanukah my family and nieces (2 and 7) lit our menorahs then went to church to a carol service. We celebrate christmakah!


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3 users have supported this.

I don't think its an issue about what children you feel you will be happy to accept (realise that comment is 2 years ago btw) but what sort of families LAs are looking for to place the children they have or are likely to have - that is where a VA can be more flexible than an LA as they "sell" families to LAs looking for them for particular often "hard to place" children rather than placements for children they have in care. Maybe the Jewish community as a whole is very good at supporting those in trouble or looking after each other and so less children come into care - just guessing as I have no direct experience - but I know there are many Muslim, Sikh and Hindu children in care - as well as those from mixed relationships and I know that unorthodox relationships and lifestyles can be difficult to accept in some of these communities which would lead to greater numbers coming into care and whilst the parents may not be actively practicing their religion they generally want their children to be brought up in the same faith.


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2 users have supported this.

Don't know where you're based but we have previously turned down a possible match with a little Jewish girl (aged 2) based on birth mother's wish she be brought up in the faith. The link was made based on Jewish grandparents in our family but I'm an atheist.


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4 users have supported this.