I've never posted on a forum before but feel at a complete loss. My partner and I have 2 birth sons 11 and 13yrs. 5 months ago our adopted daughter 7yrs moved in with us. Introductions and everything went well at the start and, though she has her issues, her behaviour isn't as challemgong as we thought it might be and she's quite affectionate and wants to be part of our family. I feel dreadful because i have no feelings for her at all. In fact i have to say that i really dont like her. I feel like the worst person in the world saying that but if she comes for a hug i have to stop myself recoiling from her. Everything she does irritates me and I feel like I can't bear her after 10 mins with her. I love children, I work with children and am very close to my sons and lots of friend's children, some with challenging behaviour. I adore being a mum and i love how much I love it. I would do anything for any of the kids I know. It's a big part of who I am. Everyone keeps telling me that if anyone can make this work then I can. But I just can't understand how I can't like my ad or love her at all. I feel totally cold to her and faking it is completely exhausting and I'm getting worse at it as time goes on. My partner is struggling to bond too but not finding it as hard emotionally as me. He thinks we have to stick with it even if it makes us all miserable forever. He thinks this is what we signed up for. He says I must have imagined some Disney scene where it's all wonderful. I don't think that's true. I thought it would be hard and I was comfortable with it feeling different to how I love my sons, at least at first. But I can't cope with feeling guilty all the time that I'm not giving her what she needs. I wonder that she'd be better being adopted by someone else without birth children and just being loved for who she is. It's all I wanted to do but I find each day a bit tortuous and think she's a danger to our families future happiness as she lies all the time. I don't know what to do and can't understand how I can be so cold to her. I hate myself. I want my happy family back. Am I wrong? Am I terrible? Could this just be a bad match? I wanted this for so long!