test_contentimg

Anyone have any experience adopting family members

Report content

Ok so this is a complicated one.


My partners sosters kids were removed from her care over 3 years ago when the youngest was 3 days old. We pht purselves forward as foster carers for them. They moved in with us a week before youngests 1st birthday. Thwy lived with us for 11 months, one day eldest had an injury we cpuld not explain and neither cpuld nursery so both boys were removed from our care in july 2016.


This case has now been ongoing since then so 16 months, social services now say they want to place the boys for adoption so does anyone no what our chances are of been approved as adopters?


We have maintained contact twice a week pver 16 months woth us travelling 90 miles from birmingham to stockport, and bsck again the nect day just for contact. All contact reports are positive


Any advice please?


up
Be the first user to support this

Hi, yes you can apply to adopt and social care will have to assess all the relatives of your sister/ her children to see if they are suitable.

However. Having fostered the children then had them removed will not help you. I know that social care can be very difficult to convince that things are ok and you are suitable adoptive parents.

These children will have had considerable trauma and as parents you’ll be called on not only to love them but to care for their trauma related needs as well as addressing any safeguarding things.

Kinship adoption does happen, I’ve known a number of families that have done this, more often with an adopted adult who cannot manage care for their child sadly.

Best thing to do is contact frg.org.uk


up
Be the first user to support this

They were only removed to investigate injury. Police found no evidence to bring any charges against us and have closed the case. We had our local authority involved with our own 2 children of the same age and have nothing to do with them anymore as they are satisfied we are not a risk to children.


Im a former nursery nurse and last week had a letter from ofsted confirming i am suitable to work with children even after they know all tge details of said incident 16 months ago!


Its purely just the spcial workers making life difficult for no reason


up
Be the first user to support this

Sadly, I think the fact that the children were removed and not returned to you will go against you. Although there was no evidence that you did anything, there is also no evidence to prove you did nothing.....I'm not saying you did something, but that its almost impossible to disprove something like this. SW assessments are all based on risk and they are likely go elsewhere if there is even a perception of risk.


I would say you should apply and ask to be assessed, but do get help to make your case as Pear Tree suggested, and be prepared to be knocked back.


The other big thing to consider is the impact on your own children. For most adoptions, children placed are the youngest in the family. If your children are similar ages there are likely to be risks to them, especially as the children get older. There is a high risk of your SIL's children having longer term issues - your children could even become the targets of difficult behaviours and in their teens, if your adopted children make allegations against you (sadly not uncommon for many reasons), your birth children could also be removed. There was a thread recently on birth children before or after adoption - much of the things discussed there will be relevant here too.


up
Be the first user to support this

Thankyou both for your advice. Theor social worker has just called me as they had theor final care planning meeting today and decided the boys will be staying in long term foster care with the family theyre placed with now. Which was a bettwr option than adoption


up
1 user has supported this.

It does sound like that is a good decision all round x


up
1 user has supported this.