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Adopting a child between a BS and an AS?

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Hi,


Does anyone have any experience or views on adopting a child between two other children? Our eldest BS is 6 years and we've an AS who is 10 months (who we've had since 8 weeks). We could keep a two year gap between the children if we adopted a child just over 3yo. However, our SWs need substantiating evidence to take to panel to enable this idea to go forward.


Any advice would be appreciated.


Regards


mchouse


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19 users have supported this.

Just wondering why you'd want to?


I think in general its better to adopt in age order and its still very early days with your AS.... I would certainly wait....and I would strongly advise against three children when two are adopted, as adopted chidren, especially when they are older when placed, can have a range of issues that won't show up until they are older....


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16 users have supported this.

I know you're not seeking views or opinions so I'll keep it brief - I've not come across it before. Sws are usually pretty insistent on keeping the current hierarchy - and even if you manage to convince your sw, it might not be easy to convince a family finder


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16 users have supported this.

I'd definitely wait and see what issues you have when your current AS gets older (pre-school/Reception). Our easy to place baby was a very challenging 4 year old and there's no way anyone would have guessed when she was a baby. It's taken 7 years to get to

something that resembles a normal family life. SW tend to be very anti out of order placements and like big age gaps.


A xx


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11 users have supported this.

Its almost unheard of to adopt a child older than any other child in the family.

I also would be wary of taking on too much. Your AC is very young, you have no idea yet, and may not for several years, what challenges your AS may present and what diagnoses may crop up. Babies are a very unknown quantity, often children are 3/4/5 before the issues they have come to light.

Enjoy your time with the two you have for a few years, youve got a nice age gap.


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12 users have supported this.

There will be reasons why your adopted 10mth old was taken into care and those will have an impact on him/her as they get older - similarly an adopted toddler can be VERY challenging - why not wait as others have said?


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12 users have supported this.

Thank you all for your comments and advice.


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9 users have supported this.